A bit unbalanced.
That's how 2016 felt.
Not saying that because I have been dealing with Cancer, well, actually I guess that's the starting point, but that's not what knocked me off-kilter.
And maybe it's more you than me.
Actually, that's not fair. It was 100% me. You were doing what awesome friends and neighbours do.
And I didn't really figure it out till I was contemplating my resolutions for 2017 - which I don't think I have ever really done.
You see I have been on the receiving end of so much kindness this year that I have felt a bit unbalanced. At the beginning of this journey it all made sense. Our family was rocked, we were unstable and trying to figure out how to fit it all in to a year. We were going to appointments, I was contemplating long term disability, things were very stressful and confusing. So you all stepped up and I cannot tell you how much it was appreciated by Tracey and I. Or is it Tracey and me. I can never figure that one out.
But as a result the tsunami of emails, gifts, time and attention that has been gifted to me has been overwhelming and lately have had the affect, or is it effect, of knocking me off-kilter a bit.
You see, I plan on being around for a long time. So in a weird way, the gifts of food, while seriously appreciated, kinda make me feel like I'm still in a state of emergency. And at this point I feel like I have it under control.
So, as I head into 2017 I am going to do my best to tip the balance a bit your way. Change myself from a position of only receiving to a position with more giving.
I am feeling great right now. I feel the last doctors meeting gave me the sense that I am on the right track with my health and that I am on a better path. Not out of the woods in any way, but at least I know where the north star is now.
So I thank all of you for all that you have done for me. It is truly appreciated. Honestly I sincerely love all of you for all you have given and in no way am I trying to take any of that away. I cannot stress that point enough. YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME AND YOU GOT US THROUGH A TOUGH TIME.
But now I am going to take all that energy and start distributing it to others.
There are many of you out there that are not doing well so let me help you out. It will, umm, on-kilter me.
As my pal Avnish says "The better I get, the better you get. And the better you get, the better I get."
2017 here we go...let's get better and better.
PS I am sure that is the record for number of times the words off-kilter have been used in short blog.
PPS I looked it up. There is no record of this accomplishment so I am considering this my first victory in 2017. It's my gift to you...
PPPS If the time comes that we have an emergency in the home again, well lets go back to square one.
PPPPS If you need some energy, please let me know.